Saturday, August 27, 2005

Where is the consistancy?

I seem to have problems accepting the things around me lately... How would i know why any way? It just seems that nothing is consistant around me... i like consistancy, but only to a certain extent... the only thing consistant so far is that nothing is consistant... but that ain't consistant... What on Earth m i talking(or typing) any way?

So far, nothing has been consistant, n i don't think any thing will be... what i m lookin for is something, or even some one, that is consistant... but ther is nothing on earth that fit this calibre... N this is gettin irritating... the only thing i can find consistant is not of this world any way...( i m a bit religious, sorry) Friends come n go... things received n gone... nothing stays the same forever... what can i say anyway? i always come here to convince myself about some thing... this is probably the only way i make myself feel better anyway...

That all the rumblings i have today... So till next time... try not to give in.... or give up... or what ever...

Saturday, August 20, 2005

My Blog Is Depressing?

Recently, one of my friend says my blog is depressing... wat is wrong with that? probably because he is too happy n can't stand a little sadness? he is probably too positive.......

Depress is wat i m... If u see me smile it probably just a mask... rarely do i truly smile or show how i feel inside.... i don't really like people to help me solve my problems, well, i don't think thay can actually solve it as only i can solve it. Why? Cause it always ends up with me doin all the work to solve it any way...

Laughter is the best medicines? Laughter sure can solve alot of problems but it can't solve all... cause laughin away ur troubles is too good to be true... If Laughin works, my blog will probably be not so depressing anyway... but then wat will be written here instead? Some things r just left to be pondered on...

Saturday, August 13, 2005

Life will always be unfair...

Life is unfair? It always has been... from before u were borned to today... think ushould have won that competition instead of that idiot next door? Well... this happens everyday... some just gets more, others lesser... Ain't this already unfair? Look around... u r sure to spot somthing that will bring u a memory of being treated unfairly...

Saw that girl? u think she is cute but u r too shy to talk to her... but when u find the courage to talk to her, u find out she wasn't what u thought her to be... not that i got this kind of experience but i just happen to think alot... (thanks to tv serial dramas...) then u realise life ain't fair... but when has it been fair? Life will always stay unfair...

SO wat m trying to do her today? Well... i m trying to convince myself(n maybe u) to get over it... wat ever life have thrown at u... Oh well... who actually reads these mindless mumblings anyway?

Thursday, August 11, 2005

M i happy i m not suicidal...

If i was suicidal, iwould not be writing this blog now n gave up on life a long time ago... but many would say life already depressing, but some, like i, have the extra load on our backs to handle. who else could do this jobs like us anyway?

Singapore's national day was yesterday... Full of fireworks etc.... but life still goes on for me... first borns in the families carries the heaviest responsibility... i m totally not very good with my studies, mainly chinese... the teacher assume too much... thinks that i didn't study?!?!?! Man, m i pissed off... wats wrong with not being good at hte subject, huh?

It was interesting spending the day at alone on 8th... i was offered a chance to go for a movie with some people but i rejected after much consideration... probably due to the name calling of me(apple plisher?).... i m just goin to blow soon over it... keeping it all insde hurts... but who knows?

Oh well... that is probably all for today... so up till next time... keep livin

Saturday, August 06, 2005

If life gives u crap... What can i do?

Life have really bad the past few days... teachers scoldin my class for being late... people not realising they were wrong in the first place... lousey test marks.... Just makes me think if life is worth living....

I wish i could just end my life here n just llike that... the temptation is huge... probably the only thing keeping me here is god(excuse me for being a bit religious but who really reads this blog anyway?)... I m probably just tryin to take each day as it comes... what else cani do anyway?

Some people out there probably don't realise other people have feelings too... Man, i also have a limit to how much i can take... no matter wat the post i have... insults r very hurtin to me... i m sensitive... only problem is i don't show much emotion or talk much about my problems... i don't want anyone else sharing my burden... some things i have to face alone...

That's all for today... so if like gives u crap, bear with it first... i sure it won't last forever...

Tuesday, August 02, 2005

I seem to have wat they call "writer's block".....

I seem to currently suffering from not knowin wat to type here...
My life seems boring... i think i m tryin to copy my friend's style...

SO WAT IS MY STYLE?!??!?!?!!?

It seems that my style seems to be non-existance...too me that is...
Can i undo the "block" By hitin my head against the walll? Been there, tried that...ended up with a massive headache anyway...

Life seems to be bad to me in every way...(I m trying not to use any 4-letter words that may sound offensive) People push u around for just being the good kid... n wats more, when u go offensive, they start regreating their earlier move... only to do agasin n again... senerios repeat again n again...

If i was the kind of person that wasn't forgiving... many would have ended up in their graves already any way... God probably put these people around me cause no one else can handle them any way... this simple thought probably keeps me going...

wow... how did i ended up with nt just a paragraph but a passsage? Oh well... this things usually comes suddenly at thimes... who knew i could do this?