Guess i am back to blog again, and no, i am not going to let the emo bug get to me... Or i hope so... XD
Look like the controvasial event now is Jeanie's blog post on missing the class, and feels slightly hurt that all of us will probably move on from now, and not bother about each other ever again. I for one don't believe in this kind of thing. Ok... I feel that we may move on, but we know that we will always be a class. No matter what we try to do, i don't think we can ever forget about what we have been doing together for the past few years, or at least for me, even thought i think i may have offended some people... Crap... If only i can be less paranoid... I kep thinking that everyone hates me...
Anyway, the above was just my 2 cents worth on what is happening. If u can't pay the 2 cents, it's ok cause i don't mind not making a profit... I got tehm for free anyway... XD
I went to take a withdrawal form to see if it was worth it for me to withdraw from the school. Then i saw i had to get 10 signatures from 10 different teachers... They want us to die before we can get out of the school?? I would have to spend a day running around the whole school... and if cannot find teacher that means have to come back the next day... Oh well, guess staying wouldn't sound so bad now... At least i will still get to leave at the end of the term... And have a heart wrentching time leaving my class... Ha...
Man... If only there would be more 4I gatherings at the moment... I am missing the class... 4I was dominated by loud girls, but the curretn class is dominated by loud guys. I am not used to that... Listening to girls n 4I talking loudly in class has became a habit... XD
Hmm... Now after soem thinking, i realised that i may have decided to leave NYJC based on a variaty of push and pull factors... Ok, maybe most of them are push factors...
Man... The ulcar in my mouth is finally disappearing, thanks to the mouth wash i has been using. But the thing is that the mouth wash is red, and when i use it my mouth burns, but i can't tell if i am bleeding in my mouth cause everthing that comes out is red...
Oh yah... HAPPY BIRTHDAY MINDA AKA ADRAIN AKA LGM!!! XD
Hmm... That's probably all for now... See yah next time!
I'm paranoid of all the people i see. Are they talking bout me? Why can't anyone see i just want to live?
Thursday, February 22, 2007
The Emo Bug Is Spreading...
Guess i am back to blog again, and no, i am not going to let the emo bug get to me... Or i hope so... XD
Look like the controvasial event now is Jeanie's blog post on missing the class, and feels slightly hurt that all of us will probably move on from now, and not bother about each other ever again. I for one don't believe in this kind of thing. Ok... I feel that we may move on, but we know that we will always be a class. No matter what we try to do, i don't think we can ever forget about what we have been doing together for the past few years, or at least for me, even thought i think i may have offended some people... Crap... If only i can be less paranoid... I kep thinking that everyone hates me...
Anyway, the above was just my 2 cents worth on what is happening. If u can't pay the 2 cents, it's ok cause i don't mind not making a profit... I got tehm for free anyway... XD
I went to take a withdrawal form to see if it was worth it for me to withdraw from the school. Then i saw i had to get 10 signatures from 10 different teachers... They want us to die before we can get out of the school?? I would have to spend a day running around the whole school... and if cannot find teacher that means have to come back the next day... Oh well, guess staying wouldn't sound so bad now... At least i will still get to leave at the end of the term... And have a heart wrentching time leaving my class... Ha...
Man... If only there would be more 4I gatherings at the moment... I am missing the class... 4I was dominated by loud girls, but the curretn class is dominated by loud guys. I am not used to that... Listening to girls n 4I talking loudly in class has became a habit... XD
Hmm... Now after soem thinking, i realised that i may have decided to leave NYJC based on a variaty of push and pull factors... Ok, maybe most of them are push factors...
Man... The ulcar in my mouth is finally disappearing, thanks to the mouth wash i has been using. But the thing is that the mouth wash is red, and when i use it my mouth burns, but i can't tell if i am bleeding in my mouth cause everthing that comes out is red...
Oh yah... HAPPY BIRTHDAY MINDA AKA ADRAIN AKA LGM!!! XD
Hmm... That's probably all for now... See yah next time!
I'm paranoid of all the people i see. Are they talking bout me? Why can't anyone see i just want to live?
Look like the controvasial event now is Jeanie's blog post on missing the class, and feels slightly hurt that all of us will probably move on from now, and not bother about each other ever again. I for one don't believe in this kind of thing. Ok... I feel that we may move on, but we know that we will always be a class. No matter what we try to do, i don't think we can ever forget about what we have been doing together for the past few years, or at least for me, even thought i think i may have offended some people... Crap... If only i can be less paranoid... I kep thinking that everyone hates me...
Anyway, the above was just my 2 cents worth on what is happening. If u can't pay the 2 cents, it's ok cause i don't mind not making a profit... I got tehm for free anyway... XD
I went to take a withdrawal form to see if it was worth it for me to withdraw from the school. Then i saw i had to get 10 signatures from 10 different teachers... They want us to die before we can get out of the school?? I would have to spend a day running around the whole school... and if cannot find teacher that means have to come back the next day... Oh well, guess staying wouldn't sound so bad now... At least i will still get to leave at the end of the term... And have a heart wrentching time leaving my class... Ha...
Man... If only there would be more 4I gatherings at the moment... I am missing the class... 4I was dominated by loud girls, but the curretn class is dominated by loud guys. I am not used to that... Listening to girls n 4I talking loudly in class has became a habit... XD
Hmm... Now after soem thinking, i realised that i may have decided to leave NYJC based on a variaty of push and pull factors... Ok, maybe most of them are push factors...
Man... The ulcar in my mouth is finally disappearing, thanks to the mouth wash i has been using. But the thing is that the mouth wash is red, and when i use it my mouth burns, but i can't tell if i am bleeding in my mouth cause everthing that comes out is red...
Oh yah... HAPPY BIRTHDAY MINDA AKA ADRAIN AKA LGM!!! XD
Hmm... That's probably all for now... See yah next time!
I'm paranoid of all the people i see. Are they talking bout me? Why can't anyone see i just want to live?
Friday, February 16, 2007
Hmm... Why Am I Still Here??
Ok... I got a 99.9% chance of leaving NYJC already, so why am i still going there every school day?? I could just pon everything and still be ok... But maybe i am too paranoid as there is still a 0.01%that i may end up back there... Oh well, never hurts to be prepared anyway... XD
2 days ago during Valentines Day, One of my classmates told us it was also known as Singles Awareness Day, or S.A.D. Sad right? So sad that they have to make a day call SAD for themselves... XD
Hmm... Just read somethign on a blog of 1 of mine juniors in Peicai... Found it interesting... So i shall show you what it is:
A young man had been to Wednesday night Bible Study.
The Pastor had shared about listening
to God and obeying the Lord's voice.
The young man couldn't help but wonder,
"Does God still speak to people?"
After service he went out with some friends
for coffee and pie and they discussed the message.
Several different ones talked about how
God had led them in different ways.
It was about ten o'clock when
the young man started driving home.
Sitting in his car, he just began to pray,
"God...If you still speak to people speak to me.
I will listen. I will do my best to obey."
As he drove down the main street of his town,
he had the strangest thought
to stop and buy a gallon of milk.
He shook his head and said out loud,
"God is that you?"
He didn't get a reply and started on toward home.
But again, the thought, buy a gallon of milk.
The young man thought about Samuel
and how he didn't recognize the voice of God,
and how little Samuel ran to Eli.
"Okay, God, in case that is you, I will buy the milk."
It didn't seem like too hard a test of obedience.
He could always use the milk.
He stopped and purchased the gallon of milk
and started off toward home.
As he passed Seventh Street, he again felt the urge,
"Turn Down that street."
This is crazy he thought and drove on past the intersection.
Again, he felt that he should turn down Seventh Street.
At the next intersection, he turned back
and headed down Seventh.
Half jokingly, he said out loud, "Okay, God, I will".
He drove several blocks, when suddenly,
he felt like he should stop.
He pulled over to the curb and looked around.
He was in semi commercial area of town.
It wasn't the best but it
wasn't the worst of neighborhoods either.
The businesses were closed
and most of the houses looked dark
like the people were already in bed.
Again, he sensed something,
"Go and give the milk to the people
in the house across the street."
The young man looked at the house.
It was dark and it looked like the people
were either gone or they were already asleep.
He started to open the door
and then sat back in the car seat.
"Lord, this is insane.
Those people are asleep and if I wake them up,
they are going to be mad and I will look stupid."
Again, he felt like he should go and give the milk.
Finally, he opened the door,
"Okay God, if this is you,
I will go to the door and I will give them the milk.
If you want me to look like a crazy person, okay.
I want to be obedient.
I guess that will count for something
but if they don't answer right away,
I am out of here."
He walked across the street and rang the bell.
He could hear some noise inside.
A man's voice yelled out,
"Who is it? What do you want?"
Then the door opened
before the young man could get away.
The man was standing there in his
jeans and T-shirt.
He looked like he just got out of bed.
He had a strange look on his face
and he didn't seem too happy
to have some stranger standing on his doorstep.
"What is it?"
The young man thrust out the gallon of milk,
"Here, I brought this to you."
The man took the milk and rushed down a hallway.
Then from down the hall came a woman
carrying the milk toward the kitchen.
The man was following her holding a baby.
The baby was crying.
The man had tears streaming down his face.
The man began speaking and half crying,
"We were just praying.
We had some big bills this month
and we ran out of money.
We didn't have any milk for our baby.
I was just praying and asking God
to show me how to get some milk."
His wife in the kitchen yelled out,
"I ask him to send an Angel with some.
Are you an Angel?"
The young man reached into his wallet
and pulled out all the money he had on him
and put in the man's hand.
He turned and walked back toward his car
and the tears were streaming down his face.
He knew that God still answers prayers.
Wow... Ok... Guess this is actually a Christian thing and you can ignore it if you want.
Hmm... I'm feeling a little now i guess... Oh well, maybe i shall go find something to play to pass the time or watch TV... See yah next time!!
2 days ago during Valentines Day, One of my classmates told us it was also known as Singles Awareness Day, or S.A.D. Sad right? So sad that they have to make a day call SAD for themselves... XD
Hmm... Just read somethign on a blog of 1 of mine juniors in Peicai... Found it interesting... So i shall show you what it is:
A young man had been to Wednesday night Bible Study.
The Pastor had shared about listening
to God and obeying the Lord's voice.
The young man couldn't help but wonder,
"Does God still speak to people?"
After service he went out with some friends
for coffee and pie and they discussed the message.
Several different ones talked about how
God had led them in different ways.
It was about ten o'clock when
the young man started driving home.
Sitting in his car, he just began to pray,
"God...If you still speak to people speak to me.
I will listen. I will do my best to obey."
As he drove down the main street of his town,
he had the strangest thought
to stop and buy a gallon of milk.
He shook his head and said out loud,
"God is that you?"
He didn't get a reply and started on toward home.
But again, the thought, buy a gallon of milk.
The young man thought about Samuel
and how he didn't recognize the voice of God,
and how little Samuel ran to Eli.
"Okay, God, in case that is you, I will buy the milk."
It didn't seem like too hard a test of obedience.
He could always use the milk.
He stopped and purchased the gallon of milk
and started off toward home.
As he passed Seventh Street, he again felt the urge,
"Turn Down that street."
This is crazy he thought and drove on past the intersection.
Again, he felt that he should turn down Seventh Street.
At the next intersection, he turned back
and headed down Seventh.
Half jokingly, he said out loud, "Okay, God, I will".
He drove several blocks, when suddenly,
he felt like he should stop.
He pulled over to the curb and looked around.
He was in semi commercial area of town.
It wasn't the best but it
wasn't the worst of neighborhoods either.
The businesses were closed
and most of the houses looked dark
like the people were already in bed.
Again, he sensed something,
"Go and give the milk to the people
in the house across the street."
The young man looked at the house.
It was dark and it looked like the people
were either gone or they were already asleep.
He started to open the door
and then sat back in the car seat.
"Lord, this is insane.
Those people are asleep and if I wake them up,
they are going to be mad and I will look stupid."
Again, he felt like he should go and give the milk.
Finally, he opened the door,
"Okay God, if this is you,
I will go to the door and I will give them the milk.
If you want me to look like a crazy person, okay.
I want to be obedient.
I guess that will count for something
but if they don't answer right away,
I am out of here."
He walked across the street and rang the bell.
He could hear some noise inside.
A man's voice yelled out,
"Who is it? What do you want?"
Then the door opened
before the young man could get away.
The man was standing there in his
jeans and T-shirt.
He looked like he just got out of bed.
He had a strange look on his face
and he didn't seem too happy
to have some stranger standing on his doorstep.
"What is it?"
The young man thrust out the gallon of milk,
"Here, I brought this to you."
The man took the milk and rushed down a hallway.
Then from down the hall came a woman
carrying the milk toward the kitchen.
The man was following her holding a baby.
The baby was crying.
The man had tears streaming down his face.
The man began speaking and half crying,
"We were just praying.
We had some big bills this month
and we ran out of money.
We didn't have any milk for our baby.
I was just praying and asking God
to show me how to get some milk."
His wife in the kitchen yelled out,
"I ask him to send an Angel with some.
Are you an Angel?"
The young man reached into his wallet
and pulled out all the money he had on him
and put in the man's hand.
He turned and walked back toward his car
and the tears were streaming down his face.
He knew that God still answers prayers.
Wow... Ok... Guess this is actually a Christian thing and you can ignore it if you want.
Hmm... I'm feeling a little now i guess... Oh well, maybe i shall go find something to play to pass the time or watch TV... See yah next time!!
Wednesday, February 14, 2007
Just Go For It
Hey people!! I guess idecided in the end to go to put poly as my first choice. Strange?? I guess it was after i consulted a few peopel before i made the decision. Maybe it is cause i didn't feel that JC life is for me, or maybe i am scared i may not make it through JC, but i guess i already made my choice and everything else is in God's hands. What course i chose? Psychology and community services in NP. It is a new course. Why? Maybe because i felt a callign to be a social worker...
Finally i feel lighter. Ah... Maybe i will do something a friend asked me to do now... Even though it has been a while since she asked... XD
Instructions: Write 20 statements intended to 20 different people, good/bad things you've always wanted to tell them, never tell which one is to whom. (Note:Not In Sequence) And i tag erm... Nat, Delia and anyone else reading this to do this...
1) HEY!!! YOU SUCK!! XD
2) You know this is describing you. Yes you. Don't try to say you want to lose contact after secondary school. Just let nature take it's course. And thanks for being there, yeah?
3) Guess what? You may never read this, but i guess i will still say it. I guess you are still as short as ever, as cheerful as ever, as pretty as ever. But i guess i will never have you. It was interesting that everytime i met you face to face, you never seemed really happy. I guess it is best for me to disppear at the moment until i settle down properly.
4) Hmm... You seems to be getting better and feeling less depressed. Is it because you keep calling me whenever you have a problem?? Not that i am saying that is a bad thing, but you know i can't be there all the time. From the 1st time i met you to now, even though quite short, you have changed alot. You have became more independent, so cheer up more!!
5) Hey, poly ain't such a bad choice right?? Just have faith in God that he will always be by your side. Adn i guess so are many of your friends like me!!
6) How many quiz are you doing at the moment anyway?? I guess you have just found an interesting way of blogging... with your tagboard. Man, that was obvious right?? Oh well, just try to stay happy always!! Maybe if i get in my first choice i may be able to counsel you... XD
7) HEY!!! Nice competing eating with you in Thailand!! When you learn soem new recipies in the cooking school must let me try hor. XD
8) Hey! Agent K is wonderign where his partner has gone. XP ALL THE BEST FOR YOUR STUDIES!!
9) I guess you learnt that i am super sarcastic the hard way... But you also know i know when to stop right?? Right?? Erm... ok... Come on... I am only sarcastic cause i care lor... XD
10) *Phew* Halfway through... We knew each other for so long already then only recently found out you lived the closes to me compared to other church mates... And then you going to move house again... Man... Now i have to go home alone on CG outings again... Lonely, Mr lonely... XD
11) Man, know you for, erm... Let me count first... Around ten years already?? Same p1 and 2 class... Then same p5 and 6 class... Then go same JC for 1st 3 months... But i guess we were neve really close due to... GENDER SEGREGATION!!! But oh well, all the best for your future!!
12) Known you for 4 years and the only thing i really know about is is that you are hyper... SUPER hyper... Rub off some energy to me can?? Or else loan i also don't mind... XD
13) Going to BMS at NP eh? I may be seeing you there... Ha... Try to relax more, don't look so stressed all the time or else you may end up with as many white hair as me... definitely not something you want... XD
14) ALL THE KIDS LOVE YOU!!! I guess the only one they attacked was me... Then the only one that they loved was you?? Probably you were to cuddley... SCHOOL BUS DRIVER!! XP
15) Hmm... Reading from your blog, i could see you are stressed at teh moment... But lighten up a little, nothing lasts forever, so this period of bad things will stop soon!! CHASE YOUR DRAMA DREAM!!
16) So what if you didn't do well for your 'O's?? You can do anything if you put your heart and soul into it. God will show you the way. ALL THE BEST!!!
17) Hey, i guess you will be remaining in NYJC right? I guessed we never really talked much out of the 2 years we were in the same class. ao far know you already 6 years and counting... I guess it is just the same for everybody i met, we only knew each other existed, nothing more. Wait a minute... This sounds too sober, so laugh now... XD
18) ARGH!!! Another person also know for long time... Let me count... 8 years++? You never really grew much since then... But anyway, all the best for you future!! (I'm repeating?? Because i runing out of things to say... XD)
19) Yah lah, you another one... alos knwo for around 8 years liao... Last time p4 in class we always play one... XD Have fun at NYJC!!
20) You knew me before i was born. You ahve been guiding me in life all this while. Thank you for being such a great... erm... Father looking over us from Heaven.
Thats all for today... Man... Logest time i actually spent in blogging for a while... See yah next time!!
Finally i feel lighter. Ah... Maybe i will do something a friend asked me to do now... Even though it has been a while since she asked... XD
Instructions: Write 20 statements intended to 20 different people, good/bad things you've always wanted to tell them, never tell which one is to whom. (Note:Not In Sequence) And i tag erm... Nat, Delia and anyone else reading this to do this...
1) HEY!!! YOU SUCK!! XD
2) You know this is describing you. Yes you. Don't try to say you want to lose contact after secondary school. Just let nature take it's course. And thanks for being there, yeah?
3) Guess what? You may never read this, but i guess i will still say it. I guess you are still as short as ever, as cheerful as ever, as pretty as ever. But i guess i will never have you. It was interesting that everytime i met you face to face, you never seemed really happy. I guess it is best for me to disppear at the moment until i settle down properly.
4) Hmm... You seems to be getting better and feeling less depressed. Is it because you keep calling me whenever you have a problem?? Not that i am saying that is a bad thing, but you know i can't be there all the time. From the 1st time i met you to now, even though quite short, you have changed alot. You have became more independent, so cheer up more!!
5) Hey, poly ain't such a bad choice right?? Just have faith in God that he will always be by your side. Adn i guess so are many of your friends like me!!
6) How many quiz are you doing at the moment anyway?? I guess you have just found an interesting way of blogging... with your tagboard. Man, that was obvious right?? Oh well, just try to stay happy always!! Maybe if i get in my first choice i may be able to counsel you... XD
7) HEY!!! Nice competing eating with you in Thailand!! When you learn soem new recipies in the cooking school must let me try hor. XD
8) Hey! Agent K is wonderign where his partner has gone. XP ALL THE BEST FOR YOUR STUDIES!!
9) I guess you learnt that i am super sarcastic the hard way... But you also know i know when to stop right?? Right?? Erm... ok... Come on... I am only sarcastic cause i care lor... XD
10) *Phew* Halfway through... We knew each other for so long already then only recently found out you lived the closes to me compared to other church mates... And then you going to move house again... Man... Now i have to go home alone on CG outings again... Lonely, Mr lonely... XD
11) Man, know you for, erm... Let me count first... Around ten years already?? Same p1 and 2 class... Then same p5 and 6 class... Then go same JC for 1st 3 months... But i guess we were neve really close due to... GENDER SEGREGATION!!! But oh well, all the best for your future!!
12) Known you for 4 years and the only thing i really know about is is that you are hyper... SUPER hyper... Rub off some energy to me can?? Or else loan i also don't mind... XD
13) Going to BMS at NP eh? I may be seeing you there... Ha... Try to relax more, don't look so stressed all the time or else you may end up with as many white hair as me... definitely not something you want... XD
14) ALL THE KIDS LOVE YOU!!! I guess the only one they attacked was me... Then the only one that they loved was you?? Probably you were to cuddley... SCHOOL BUS DRIVER!! XP
15) Hmm... Reading from your blog, i could see you are stressed at teh moment... But lighten up a little, nothing lasts forever, so this period of bad things will stop soon!! CHASE YOUR DRAMA DREAM!!
16) So what if you didn't do well for your 'O's?? You can do anything if you put your heart and soul into it. God will show you the way. ALL THE BEST!!!
17) Hey, i guess you will be remaining in NYJC right? I guessed we never really talked much out of the 2 years we were in the same class. ao far know you already 6 years and counting... I guess it is just the same for everybody i met, we only knew each other existed, nothing more. Wait a minute... This sounds too sober, so laugh now... XD
18) ARGH!!! Another person also know for long time... Let me count... 8 years++? You never really grew much since then... But anyway, all the best for you future!! (I'm repeating?? Because i runing out of things to say... XD)
19) Yah lah, you another one... alos knwo for around 8 years liao... Last time p4 in class we always play one... XD Have fun at NYJC!!
20) You knew me before i was born. You ahve been guiding me in life all this while. Thank you for being such a great... erm... Father looking over us from Heaven.
Thats all for today... Man... Logest time i actually spent in blogging for a while... See yah next time!!
Friday, February 09, 2007
Choices... Only Choices...
Man... I guess i ain't really over the moon with my 'O' Level results, nor am i really sad over it... Guess i am just... confused... The result is neither here nor there. It is in the middle of no where. My dad said that it isn't what you do when you pass, but what you do when you fail that shows you who you are. What does it have to do with me?? He said i was neither here nor there, and it is like failing ot actually get something better. Not that he was trying to suan me or anything, but was showing me that i had to make my own choice for myself. And this time, i ain't allowing anyone to get in the way... After i decided that is...
Ok... What did i actually get?? Just ask me next time you see me. I don't care if you people say it is not bad. Being in NYJC for the pass few weeks have shown me that if i want to stay in a JC, i have to work harder... ALOT harder... Which i may not be able to handle... If only JC was had more tutorials... Maybe that would be better and i may consider staying... Now with my points deduction, i only managed to BARELY get into NYJC based on their last year cut off point. And crap... That sucks...
Oh well... I shall listen to my dad's advice and consider my options over the weekend... May God help me through it...
Every little thing matters... Even fear of the past repeating itself...
Ok... What did i actually get?? Just ask me next time you see me. I don't care if you people say it is not bad. Being in NYJC for the pass few weeks have shown me that if i want to stay in a JC, i have to work harder... ALOT harder... Which i may not be able to handle... If only JC was had more tutorials... Maybe that would be better and i may consider staying... Now with my points deduction, i only managed to BARELY get into NYJC based on their last year cut off point. And crap... That sucks...
Oh well... I shall listen to my dad's advice and consider my options over the weekend... May God help me through it...
Every little thing matters... Even fear of the past repeating itself...
Monday, February 05, 2007
I Just Don't Know...
Guess i just don't know what choice to make in life now. D-day is just 4 days away. 4 days of toment. 4 days of pressure. 4 days of choices. Or maybe just 4 days to make everything right again...
Having been in the the current class in JC, I realised so many of us actually fear gettin our results, with many of us talking about seeing our faces in the obitary next week... And we also came up with many ways of how to die... Stealing potassium or rubidium from the chem lab and eatting it... Teh traditional jumping... You get the drift... I wonder who actually reads this anyway? The emo thoughts of a ordinary person? Guess all of us are just looking for soemone to open up to. I guess many of you are lucky to have someone... Guess i can only play the role of the listener at the moment... Who will be willing to listen to all my crap anyway?? No one right?? Makes me wonder what allows me to be willing to actually listen to people problems... What actually makes me tick so differently? Crap...
I am curretnly wondering if the JC path is the right route for me... Am i more suitable for the poly way of life?? Wonder if my mom is willing to accept the fact that i no matter where i end up, i will be going home later. She will have to anyway, cause if she don't... I guess there will be a scene at home again...
V-day's coming up soon too. One of my classmates was making a fuss over spending it alone. I guess i understand it, but i guess staying single is best for me at the moment... Especially with J is currently at the same JC. I guess i feel i am missing soemthing everytime a couple around my age walks pass... I try to cheer myself up that at least i am saving more $$ then them, but i will always feel left out some how... Not sure why though...
Now CCA choice is also affecting me... My mom is not happy with me joining Dragon Boat. (She never seems to be happy with anything anyway...) And guess becasue i am also soft-hearted so i am considering Petanque. Why? From what i saw of the last Petanque training last Wednesday, it seemed like i am the only one who actually took it seriously... And it has downgraded from a CCA to a interest group, meaning that it doesn't receive funding from the school anymore... And it feels liek if i don't join them, i may be letting them down and let this sport die in the school... Shit... And maybe there was another reason i joined Dragon Boat... I heard that J was interested to join it a week before CCA started...
Crap... Look like i need some major de-stressing... WHERE IS MY BASKETBALL?!?!? Man... Look like i need to ask my mom where did she dump it... I hope there is not need for an air-pump... Cause i currently don't have one... And please don't tell me my mom threw it away...
Guess i blew it now... No more places to run... No more places to hide... Looks like i have to face it now...
Having been in the the current class in JC, I realised so many of us actually fear gettin our results, with many of us talking about seeing our faces in the obitary next week... And we also came up with many ways of how to die... Stealing potassium or rubidium from the chem lab and eatting it... Teh traditional jumping... You get the drift... I wonder who actually reads this anyway? The emo thoughts of a ordinary person? Guess all of us are just looking for soemone to open up to. I guess many of you are lucky to have someone... Guess i can only play the role of the listener at the moment... Who will be willing to listen to all my crap anyway?? No one right?? Makes me wonder what allows me to be willing to actually listen to people problems... What actually makes me tick so differently? Crap...
I am curretnly wondering if the JC path is the right route for me... Am i more suitable for the poly way of life?? Wonder if my mom is willing to accept the fact that i no matter where i end up, i will be going home later. She will have to anyway, cause if she don't... I guess there will be a scene at home again...
V-day's coming up soon too. One of my classmates was making a fuss over spending it alone. I guess i understand it, but i guess staying single is best for me at the moment... Especially with J is currently at the same JC. I guess i feel i am missing soemthing everytime a couple around my age walks pass... I try to cheer myself up that at least i am saving more $$ then them, but i will always feel left out some how... Not sure why though...
Now CCA choice is also affecting me... My mom is not happy with me joining Dragon Boat. (She never seems to be happy with anything anyway...) And guess becasue i am also soft-hearted so i am considering Petanque. Why? From what i saw of the last Petanque training last Wednesday, it seemed like i am the only one who actually took it seriously... And it has downgraded from a CCA to a interest group, meaning that it doesn't receive funding from the school anymore... And it feels liek if i don't join them, i may be letting them down and let this sport die in the school... Shit... And maybe there was another reason i joined Dragon Boat... I heard that J was interested to join it a week before CCA started...
Crap... Look like i need some major de-stressing... WHERE IS MY BASKETBALL?!?!? Man... Look like i need to ask my mom where did she dump it... I hope there is not need for an air-pump... Cause i currently don't have one... And please don't tell me my mom threw it away...
Guess i blew it now... No more places to run... No more places to hide... Looks like i have to face it now...
Friday, February 02, 2007
Sigh... Dunno What To Type Here...
Finally i am taking time to update this blog... I must admit i was too lazy to update this blog the past few days... I haven't been really doing my homework anyway, just probably playing more then studying...
JC life in NY is fun, but the environment is really like play play all the time... But i guess there are also those that have probably started studying... I can't really find the mood to study anyway, with the 'O' Levels results coming out next week and such... Just very afraid that i may not do well... Consistant results doesn't mean anything if you can screw it up in the final exams... Crap... I think i am frightening myself...
Now, i am still wondering what CCA to join here... Dragon boat or Petanque?? I am actually thinking of joining both, but both have training sessions on the same day... I acutally ried out petanque training last week, and i realised only i really took the training seriously... And was thinking about joining them cause it is just too pitiful... And i did well that day too... Oh well... I hope everything works out well in the end...
I guess i am getting tired... Maybe i will rest early tonight... Or maybe i should go play a little... Nevermind... Maybe i shall go sulk in one corner for no reason tonight... Maybe there is a reason for me to be emo but i guess iwon't be revealing it... Yeah... XD
Ha... That should be enough for now... See yah people next time!!
It is not that i wanted to fall sick, but i couldn't stop falling sick... I guess the same can be said about how i feel now...
JC life in NY is fun, but the environment is really like play play all the time... But i guess there are also those that have probably started studying... I can't really find the mood to study anyway, with the 'O' Levels results coming out next week and such... Just very afraid that i may not do well... Consistant results doesn't mean anything if you can screw it up in the final exams... Crap... I think i am frightening myself...
Now, i am still wondering what CCA to join here... Dragon boat or Petanque?? I am actually thinking of joining both, but both have training sessions on the same day... I acutally ried out petanque training last week, and i realised only i really took the training seriously... And was thinking about joining them cause it is just too pitiful... And i did well that day too... Oh well... I hope everything works out well in the end...
I guess i am getting tired... Maybe i will rest early tonight... Or maybe i should go play a little... Nevermind... Maybe i shall go sulk in one corner for no reason tonight... Maybe there is a reason for me to be emo but i guess iwon't be revealing it... Yeah... XD
Ha... That should be enough for now... See yah people next time!!
It is not that i wanted to fall sick, but i couldn't stop falling sick... I guess the same can be said about how i feel now...
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